It’s a question that I bet most of us have heard before. If you’re like me, you’ve had two answers to this question. One that you speak aloud, and one that you hold close to heart. One is the safe answer, the other…well, it requires risk, faith, and mounds of courage.
And yet, isn’t that the exact purpose of the question anyway? To open us to the freedom of dreaming by removing the risk and the fear? To give us permission to be bold and put words to our dreams? To dare, to hope, to imagine, to live unleashed.
So, what is my honest, raw, gritty answer to this question? To speak. To open my mouth and use my voice.
I can now openly admit that the first time I felt this desire was almost a decade ago. So why has it taken so long for me to own this?
- Fear of simply not being good enough. The fear of mediocrity kept me silent. BUT…if the BAR we set is so high that it prevents us from even taking a first step, then the bar becomes a chain, not a goal.
- Fear of misrepresenting Jesus. I am not a theologian. I don’t have a degree in Religion. BUT…I am an expert on my story. I have had a front row seat to the life that Jesus has lead me through and this is my platform.
- Fear of change. I’m in my mid-40s. Literally…I’m 45. I was afraid that in order to succeed in this field I should’ve started long ago. BUT…God’s timing is perfect. Call me a slow learner, but the nuggets of wisdom from a well lived life have added up. It’s time to share.
- Fear of failure. In order to find the courage to take a first step, I had to start by examining and then correctly adjusting my definition of “success”. What are my expectations? I’m learning to celebrate each next step as its own success, and leave the future to Jesus.
How was I unleashed from this fear? I came upon this scripture:
Now go! I will be with you as you speak, and I will instruct you in what to say.
So many things jumped out at me!
- “Now” was the first word, and it felt as if God was saying, “Okay. It’s time.”
- The first sentence ends with an explanation mark! It’s not a suggestion. It’s a command.
- He gives me the assurance I will not be alone, that He will be with me.
- He promises He will equip me with the words to speak.
After praying on this scripture, the words suddenly became the “neon sign” I’d hoped for. How could I ignore this any longer?
So, here we go! Welcome to my journey! It’s my hope that you will be able to relate to some of the things Jesus has taught me along the way. I promise that I will be real and honest, even when it’s hard and ugly…especially then. I can’t control where and how this all lands. I’m choosing to leave that part to Jesus.
How about you?
Maybe you’ve already wrestled with this question before. What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail? Really? Keep wrestling with it. Put words and handlebars around it. Turn it around and over like a gem- examining it and getting to know it. What is it saying to you? How is fear getting in your way?
Don’t get carried away with the “what ifs?”. Just pray over and consider what’s the best next step.
I’m cheering you on!